A Boy is Coming

I fully admit for my first two pregnancy I was hoping for boys and was disappointed when the imaging revealed girl genital. However, as soon as you lock eyes on the amazing child that enters the world gender no longer seems important. She is beautiful and she is yours.

Well.... with the third pregnancy I was completely prepared for a third girl. And why not? I am a girl. I know girls. The girl "stuff" has already been accumulated. I even have the perfect names selected- Willow Bloom. Maybe even Willow Song if Bloom is too hippie. Sure having a boy would be fine so not to have an abundance of estrogen, but I don't think the husband has it in him.

The day of anatomy scanning arrives. I'm open to any verdict, but I have my suspicions. As the technician moves her wand searching for the baby's bottom I glance in time to catch the distinct feature I was not expecting. And right on que the woman announces I'm having a boy. Uh? I did not see that coming.

By no means am I disappointed. By now I'm use to girls. My only concern is acquiring boy items. What I do find surprising is the degree of excitement from family thrilled about about a boy. My husband it makes sense why having more testosterone in the house is important. I did not forsee my father being relieved to having a grandson. He has been a song bird about the news, which I find down right adorable. My dad is ready to make mischief with a boy.

Both my girls offer completely different perspectives and approach of parenting. A boy's brain will be a whole another lesson, especially since I am a sister of another sister with little exposure to boys. My hope is my daughters will offer assistance without weighing a girliness. Just like today is, I'm sure every day will be an important lesson and an interesting ride.

Baby Names

Lucille = light
Olive = peace
Peter = the rock

Charlotte's Web

I miss you, beautiful weaving creature, spinning your perfect home.
Each day began viewing your guarding presence like an angel radiating our home.
Then each night we wished you “goodnight “ and success trapping your prey.
As I descend my stairs you were the picture perfect frame of nature offering endless arachnology lessons.
I watched you wait, I watched you attack, I watched you eat, I watched you weave, I watched you grow.
Then on that faithful night all of your essence manifested into your purpose with dedication and diligence.
The egg was complete. – The trophy – left you exhausted.
Shortly after, with your prized possession suspended securely in the window's corner, you disappeared web and all.
A certain sadness wells up as we all gather by the window hoping to see your growing belly or nibble legs.
My youngest child points and calls out hoping you will magically appear.
As I walk the grounds I search for your signature web pronouncing your brilliance, but I never find you though posts and trees are consumed by nearly related cousins occupying the most promising opportunities.
I know your fate. I know what time has in store, but I am struggling to say “good-bye.”
I do promise to keep your token safe and hidden.
I just hope your offspring will enchant our home with her seasonal presence to keep your legacy living.
Farewell, Charlotte. You are missed.

My tribute to Burton

I'm sorry I did not go to your memorial paddle. If you were alive I know you would have wanted me there, but I now hope you understand why I wasn't.

I wanted to see the last place you enjoyed. You picked a hell of a place to meet your maker. The Linville Gorge is gorgeous. I look forward to many more visits to explore this amazing landscape and remembering you.

I promise I will paddle more and practice more boldness. I will do my best to introduce my kids to the sport we have loved so much. You will have to trust I will teach them the best way I know without throwing them into the boiling waters.

I look forward to the day when we are reunited. Until then I will miss you very much and try to live with little regret.